Ending with gratitude

Ending with gratitude!

It is the time of year to take a step back. To hold up a mirror and reflect on what we have done and who we have become after another unpredictable year.

For some of us, we have been blessed with a year of clarity and growth. For others, it has been a year filled with challenges and difficulties.

I think my year has been somewhere in the middle of that scale. While I have experienced tremendous growth I have also experienced tremendous uncertainty and struggles on my journey.

The thing which has kept me going and growing has been a gratitude practice I have adopted. Every morning when I wake up, I mention 3 things I am grateful for from the day before. Whether it be something as trivial as a cup of tea or something as big as travelling during these times, this practice has helped me reframe and reflect on the good in my life and shift my perspective on difficult days.

But I want to share the story of why I started this practice.

On May 3rd 2021, my mom had an appointment with her doctor as she hadn’t been feeling well and she needed some procedures. We didn’t think too much of it and while my mom was at the doctor, my little brother came into my room and asked me if I could drop him at a party.

As I drove out of my complex, my parents were driving back in and as a I peered into their car I saw they had puffy eyes and their faces were red.

I knew in that moment what it was. My body went into shock and I immediately did a u-turn and followed them back into the complex.

My mom got out the car and broke the news that she had been diagnosed with Colon Cancer and they were going to operate in the next few days. I didn’t really know how to react in the situation. My body was in shock, my heart was racing, I was holding back tears, it was all a blur. Then suddenly my mom starts singing.

The song she sang is a Jewish song about gratitude and she starts smiling and almost dancing.

I still ask her to this day what made her start singing this song and she doesn’t really have answers for me but at that moment she let her faith take over and let gratitude be the leader of her life.

My mother is (Thank G-D) cleared of Cancer and the help we received in that time was mind blowing.

But I will never forget my mom’s response.

When we approach life with gratitude we truly can get through anything!

So what are you grateful for this year?

Have a well-deserved rest my friends!

–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

Inspiration

The power of inspiration!

Where does inspiration come from?

Over the past few weeks I have tried to be aware of what inspires me, what makes me energised, what motivates me to change?

A few days ago, I was reading a magazine for a non-profit organisation within my community. This organisation assists people in crisis and they do extremely incredible work.

This annual edition of the magazine highlighted their volunteers and I found myself surprised when I saw many familiar faces. Many of my friends or people I know from the community volunteer their precious time to help others.

It was a moment where I realised that my inspiration comes from seeing other people trying to make the world a better place.

I have used this inspiration to try and start doing things to help the community.

Inspiration is something personal and I believe it is important to identify what makes you feel inspired as this can be a major catalyst to personal growth and change.

Think about what inspires you and how you can use that inspiration to build a better world!

–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

Is your head lying?

Is your head lying?

We all have an inner voice which speaks to us!
It can be filled with positivity or it can have a negative side to it.

Whenever I teach, it becomes evident as to who has a negative voice and who has a positive one.

Students with a positive voice are willing to question, step out of their comfort zone and explore their curiosity. Students with a negative voice let their doubts cripple their ability and do not let themselves take risks.

So what is the trick to helping us reframe or get rid of this negative voice?

Don’t believe everything it says!
Your thoughts are not all true!

You might think you are lazy when in fact you are just tired and need a break.
You might think you are not smart or not a high achiever but you might not be in a situation, job or class which highlights your unique ability.

Too many of us are riddled with anxiety and self-doubt because we let these voices override us.

Think about your thinking, question its validity!

Remember, you have inherent worth and something to add to this world!
So do not let that voice control you!
You have the ability to make the world a better place!

–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

Community

• 

Community.

At the beginning of 2020 I was sitting at a bar on the Island of Borocay in South East Asia.

A man had his cell phone balancing delicately while he was screaming at the screen. There is only one thing that makes people scream like that – sports.

He was watching Man United play a match and I desperately wanted to watch. I asked if I could join and we both started sharing our mutual love for the club. He was from Iran, I am from South Africa. For those 90 minutes we became a community.

Community has been difficult to find during the past year or so. But I want to take you back to a moment which changed me and gave me a community far different from one I ever imagined.

In June 2019, I was teaching a Grade 5 class. I was probably enthusiastically and passionately screaming about being kind or something like that, when one of my co-teachers walked into the room.

She was pale and said that she needed to speak with me…

We sat on the floor outside the classroom, crying at the tragic news that one of my former campers had taken his life.
I did not know where to turn and my body went into complete shock.

After a few minutes, I managed to pull myself up and go into the class. The students immediately inquired where I had been and if I was okay.

I could not share this news with them, but they knew something devastating had just happened.

Many of the students found out about the unfortunate events that had transpired when they went home.

The next day, I was given this card by that Grade 5 class:

Dear Mr Poyurs, Miss G and Miss R

We are so sorry about what happened and we wish you all a long life.
Just know that we are all with you.
We all feel really bad and we wish you all but the best for the future.
You guys are amazing people, kind, and caring!!!!

WE ARE ALL SORRY

Love Grade 5G

Community can come from a group of Grade 5’s, from an Iranian man in the Philippines or any space where we decide to open our hearts to the humans who are in our presence.

Let’s strive to create communities which care about one another.

— Imagine a better world together — ❤

The courage to dream

The Courage to Dream

I love playing a game called ‘Light Bulb Questions’. I ask students to pick a different coloured light bulb and each one reveals a new question for the student to answer. My favourite question is, “What is one dream that you have for the future?”
The answers are always magical. The students – ranging from ages ten to thirteen – would share their unfiltered ambitions. One girl told me how she plans on building sustainable housing in villages in Africa.

As we grow older, we realise how much effort it takes to become wealthy; how strenuous it is to become a professional athlete or how daunting it is to pack up and travel. Our dreams begin to fade. With rejection, social anxiety and the realization that resources are limited; we stash away our box of dreams and label it as ‘fantasy’.

I felt saddened by this idea that so many childhood aspirations are simply neglected because they are deemed unrealistic. I wanted to try and change this; so, I challenged myself to start to making a concerted effort to realise some of my ‘fantastical’ dreams.

I focused my attention on some of my dreams and I began to see them transform into something tangible. I managed to start my own business – after taking a huge risk and leaving a stable corporate job. I used this new business to fuel some of my other dreams such as travelling; which I was fortunate enough to do while networking and building my company.

However, this past year has also brought some nightmarish things into reality. The world has been plagued by disease and my own family with my mother’s cancer. And although, as a child I never dreamed of having the cures to these unforeseen struggles; I used my renewed belief in dreams to get me through.

Now, even though, we are still in the pandemic, I feel privileged to be one of the South African educators who was able to be vaccinated. And my mother been declared cancer free and is on the way to a full recovery.
All these experiences, the good, the challenging and the terrible have taught me many things. But, the one thing – that I feel has most deeply impacted me – is the courage that I had to have to pursue my dreams through it all. It takes a tremendous amount of courage to believe that tomorrow will bring something new; to feel the pain and to still see the light.

In a year where I have felt at times despondent, anxious and lonely, I have also had the courage to dream! And it is the dreams which always out live the difficultly!

Have the courage to dream!

–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

The last one… for now

The Last One… For Now
My journey as the Optimist Blogger began one year ago when I decided to start sharing ideas on optimism, kindness and community.
I had several goals in mind when writing these posts:

1) Be of service to people.
2) Work on my consistency and persistence.
3) Challenge myself and those around me.
4) Share stories of inspiration in a dark time.
5) Learn and grow every week in order to have something to post.

I started my blog with a story of a simple smile to a Woolworths shop teller in the Umhalanga Airport in South Africa.
Almost one year to the day from posting that I was standing in Woolworths, Umhalanga. About 20km from the one in the airport. I do not live in this area and I was visiting for a holiday.
I had just got off a frustrating call with insurance saying that I had to pay a lot of money for an accident that I didn’t cause…
I was not in my best mood and despite the beautiful surroundings, I was feeling annoyed.
I needed some basic groceries so I walked from my temporary desk at the coffee shop into the store. I got to the cashier, ready to pay for my groceries and go back to the coffee shop.
While I was standing there I heard the teller in the counter next to mine say, “Sorry Madam, but you don’t have any more credit.”
I saw a middle-aged woman look so despondent. She had could not pay for her two items and she began to walk out the store with her head down.
I stopped her and asked if she needed me to pay for her shopping…
If it wasn’t for this blog, I don’t think I would have had the courage to stop her and offer to pay.
Recently, I have started my own business. I returned to the field of education and although it is my passion my earnings have decreased. I have had to become more careful about how I choose to spend money. Yet, there was an opportunity to do good and I’m really proud I took it.
I encourage you all to look for moments of kindness, believe that the world can be good and that people are inherently good!
Thank you to all my readers for giving me the courage and feedback which has made this journey so worth it!
I will post again in the future but for now I am taking a break!
Feel free to reach out if you ever need some optimism or someone to listen to you!!
Lastly, I want you to stop for a moment and do one thing…

IMAGINE A BETTER WORLD TOGETHER!

From my heart to yours,
Ari ❤

The hug

The hug!
A dear friend who lives in Israel recently told me a story that touched my heart.
Whenever he is in Jerusalem, he goes to find someone who is begging and buys them traditional Jewish bread – Challah. He buys it because it is a requirement for Jewish people to have this at their meals on Friday night and Saturday.
He was walking through the market with this bread and saw a cheerful man who was asking for money. He decided to also get him a cake.
He went over and gave these gifts to this man. The man turned to him, with gratitude in his eyes and asked, “Can I hug you?”
My friend has had his Covid vaccine and for the first time in almost a year, he hugged a stranger.
He told me that this hug held so much emotion that he felt as if he was wrapped in the embrace of a parent. He could feel the warmth, care and gratitude emanating from this stranger and my friend felt held and cared for!
We have lost our ability to hug this last year but we can still hold people with our words and our actions!
Sending a massive hug to anyone reading this!
–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

The Secret to Happiness

The Secret to Happiness: A Moment of Reflection
Wow, it has nearly been a year writing my blog. I cannot express how much self-growth I have achieved through writing about optimism, kindness and gratitude every week!
I am always on a journey of self-growth but actually putting something out there every week has made me so much more aware and mindful of my life and my happiness.
Every week, I have asked myself the question, “How can I inspire people this week?”, “Am I happy or am I just simply writing about something that I want to believe in but I’m not there yet…”
I began writing this blog when I was in the Philippines at the beginning of 2020 but I never had the courage to post it.
My trip was a massive turning point in my life because it was the moment I realised I was chasing something which wasn’t making me happy.
I was on my way to Australia to begin earning in dollars. I had convinced myself that it was to make a difference and become more adventurous (which was a little true) but to be honest, I was sick and tired of being a teacher in South Africa. I didn’t want to be an educator because, to be honest, while it is noble and meaningful being a teacher, who really wants to be the male earning the least in the room? Who wants to be the guy disciplining students for a living? Compared to my friends in the financial sector, I felt like a child.
When I went to the Philippines, I saw something different. I saw people who weren’t chasing status or money or power. They were chasing life! They were chasing connection! They were chasing happiness!
The past year has presented me with a lot of difficulties: finding the “right job”; the “right relationship”; the “right words to inspire”. However, it has been a journey of growth, inspiration and self-discovery.
I am working on practicing gratitude every day; to stop comparing myself to my friends; learning; understanding myself and using my unique abilities to do good!
So what is the secret to happiness?
I believe that it is unequivocally acknowledging that you are a work in progress and owning your journey! Oh, and go be kind to yourself and someone else today!

–Imagine a better world together– ❤🌍

#optimism #leadership #happiness #happy #inspiration

Be your own hero

Be your own hero!
One of the most inspiring and profound speeches I have ever heard is Matthew McConaughey’s acceptance speech for the Academy Award for his role in ‘Dallas Buyers’ Club’.
McConaughey was once asked, “Who is your hero?”
After time thinking about it for some time he replied, “Me in 5 years.”
The person returned in 5 years and asked, “Are you your hero yet?”
McConaughey replied, “Not even close, my hero is me in 10 years…”
He was always chasing himself! He is never satisfied with where he is at but rather always chasing a better version of himself.

Satya Nadella, CEO of Microsoft, brilliantly named someone like this a learn-it-all and not a know-it-all.
People like Matthew McConaughey do great things in the world because they are always growing and stepping out of their comfort zones. When I was writing this blog post, he announced that he was considering running for Governor of Texas…

Life is full of opportunities and it up to us to grab them!
Some people are perfectly fine with doing the same thing for a long time and those people are special and keep the world moving; but then there are people who need to be constantly moving, doing and growing. If you are that person, strive every day to be your own hero!
Imagine who you want to be and continue striving to be that hero!

0–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

Human Tribe

Human Tribe.

I love to wear my Manchester United shirt when I travel. It is a fantastic way to meet and engage with people who I would have normally walked past without blinking an eye. Whenever I am on planes or in airports it immediately becomes a topic of conversation.

People either want to connect with me because we are part of the same tribe or they want to belittle me because I am not part of their tribe. It is mostly done with good humour but I assume if I were to go to parts of England with the shirt on, it would not be taken so lightly…

We often try  to identify people who are part of a shared community thus creating a connection. In Mauritius, I surprised myself at how excited I was to meet a fellow South African family from a remote town near George. I would have never noticed them if we weren’t in a foreign country. Yet, in a place where I didn’t feel deeply connected to anyone; I wanted to connect with the piece of home that they represented.

We often look at people as part of our tribe or not. We often do this with race, you’re Black, I am White. Therefore, we are different. You’re Muslim, I am Jewish. Therefore, there is an underlying tension. I believe this politically, you believe that. Therefore we cannot ever agree with each other.
While there are differences in our appearances, beliefs, interests, views and thoughts; what we often negate is that we all fall under the same umbrella – HUMAN BEINGS.
That means that we have all experienced some form of joy, loss, excitement, disappointment, confusion or anxiety.

Being human means we all have a lot more in common than we can see on the surface.
I often have to remind myself that people who are not from my community are humans who deserve respect.

I was privileged to be in Cape Town recently; where a friend of mine stopped to give a homeless man 50 rand. He explained to me that he saw this man  everywhere and felt like he knew him.
In that moment I realised that my friend saw a human in need and reached out. A human just like you or me.

I humbly ask for us to develop an awareness of the fact that the people around us are human even if they are not part of our tribe.
 
–Imagine a better world together– 🌎❤

#kind #optimism #leadership #motivation #inspiration #care #human #human-centric #theoptimismblog